tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-30302188707592012562024-02-18T17:38:24.852-08:00FLUX: Life After Foster CareWith this book, Foster Care Alumni of America is starting a conversation within our community, and you are invited to be part of it!Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11944993180509479994noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3030218870759201256.post-83828347758882982162010-02-15T06:11:00.000-08:002010-02-15T06:23:36.825-08:00FLUX is reviewed in Mockingbird Times<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidJxSwjcjyipLNgTFJfBS8dvlTm7_0wBxnrE9fzbpVZtIFeC93zWTNW0_0DsI3hjBuMmguu0_EL97c6nEGPtTTVm1m4Oqp71zg4OENVwAjiMKkxq3S2HpxkdKGvWlv-QRZ2gxcBlAmxt4/s1600-h/logo.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" ct="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEidJxSwjcjyipLNgTFJfBS8dvlTm7_0wBxnrE9fzbpVZtIFeC93zWTNW0_0DsI3hjBuMmguu0_EL97c6nEGPtTTVm1m4Oqp71zg4OENVwAjiMKkxq3S2HpxkdKGvWlv-QRZ2gxcBlAmxt4/s320/logo.gif" /></a></div><br />
The <a href="http://www.mockingbirdsociety.org/february-2010-mockingbird-times/#flux">Mockingbird Times</a> is an online publication about foster care and homelessness, written for and by kids who've lived through both. <br />
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<span style="color: #e69138;"><strong>In Amanda Bevington's words:</strong></span><br />
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<em><span style="color: black;">"Personally, I don’t like to read, but I enjoyed</span> </em><a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org/resources/FLUX/"><em>FLUX</em></a> <em><span style="color: black;">a lot because I could relate to it. It made me look at life differently. It’s interesting to read stories from other alumni that have experienced the same things that I have. </span></em><br />
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<em><span style="color: black;">"The book is not just a book that shares a lot of different personal stories, but one that teaches young adults about real life experiences and how to deal with them in a healthy, mature way. I believe people that have experienced the foster system in some way are very curious about the topics that are in this book."</span></em><br />
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<span style="color: #e69138;"><strong>Read the rest of Amanda's book review</strong></span> in the <a href="http://www.mockingbirdsociety.org/february-2010-mockingbird-times/#flux">Feb. 2010 issue of Mockingbird Times</a>.Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11944993180509479994noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3030218870759201256.post-827050614339308182009-12-07T11:47:00.001-08:002009-12-08T09:47:07.503-08:00The Terror of Intimacy<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhM6SCzjhcJxa0YGNeMk_KdEfSpFLINWjeikGB74IRyD75PlwlX4FzBVxM4S0AURFqr3wWG6D35oUePsi8-Uqsu8_fonxmMoeXwcp4lIrvsHJB80zV3YwTEZ8MCdPmlV6TI3At3VwJCvYw/s1600-h/cut_cake_big.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5412588152372990562" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 222px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 320px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhM6SCzjhcJxa0YGNeMk_KdEfSpFLINWjeikGB74IRyD75PlwlX4FzBVxM4S0AURFqr3wWG6D35oUePsi8-Uqsu8_fonxmMoeXwcp4lIrvsHJB80zV3YwTEZ8MCdPmlV6TI3At3VwJCvYw/s320/cut_cake_big.jpg" border="0" /></a><span style="color:#993300;"><span style="color:#000000;">I loved the suggestion in</span> <a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org/resources/FLUX.htm">FLUX</a> <span style="color:#000000;">that, in order for each of us to move forward, we might need to leave certain things behind.<br /><br />As a</span> <a href="http://www.sunshinegirlonarainyday.com/">former foster child</a>, </span><span style="color:#000000;">the two burdens mentioned in the book that weighed me down most on my journey were:<br /><br /></span><ul><li><em><span style="color:#000000;">"Leaving behind the idea that you are either good or bad, a success or a failure -- because we're all a messy mix of both those things." </span></em></li></ul><p><em><span style="color:#000000;"></span></em></p><ul><li><em><span style="color:#000000;">"Leaving behind the safety of doing things alone -- because emotional intimacy requires vulnerability."</span></em></li></ul><p><span style="color:#990000;">I'll never forget how terrified I was on my wedding day.</span></p><div><span style="color:#000000;">I had made it through foster care - through college - though graduate school. I'd traveled the journey from homeless teenager to full-time professional. </span></div><br /><div><span style="color:#000000;"><span style="color:#990000;">But nothing in my past had prepared me for the sheer horror of trusting my heart to someone.</span> </span></div><br /><div><span style="color:#993300;"><span style="color:#000000;">It was the scariest risk I ever took. And the bravest and</span> <a href="http://nofearinlove.com/wedding/eat_cake_big.htm">best decision</a> </span><span style="color:#000000;">that I ever made.</span></div><div><span style="color:#000000;"></span></div><br /><span style="color:#993300;"><span style="color:#000000;">To be honest, I believe that the reason why I often felt inadequate when facing new challenges was that I didn't have a <a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org/resources/FLUX.htm">"how-to manual"</a> to show me the way. </span></span><br /><span style="color:#993300;"><span style="color:#000000;"></span></span><br /><span style="color:#993300;"><span style="color:#000000;">I'm so glad that we </span><a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org/">foster care alumni</a> </span><span style="color:#000000;">are lighting the way for one another today...</span>Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11944993180509479994noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3030218870759201256.post-63454062630132364482009-12-03T16:56:00.000-08:002009-12-03T18:44:28.920-08:00FLUX Helped Me Heal!<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBOGEr36gBZl-lprEK7bubiqELxmPqF5DDb8MNuGZppqY0zYHhCfM3UApflejFc4XtznF_ihI1nGdui7Bi46G7ggFLbfpvHPVtVQ_cvEd5HhunZ3iNu2z_SFTAbGUg5EsE1ftP2zauVJk/s1600-h/sharon+stone"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 319px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBOGEr36gBZl-lprEK7bubiqELxmPqF5DDb8MNuGZppqY0zYHhCfM3UApflejFc4XtznF_ihI1nGdui7Bi46G7ggFLbfpvHPVtVQ_cvEd5HhunZ3iNu2z_SFTAbGUg5EsE1ftP2zauVJk/s400/sharon+stone" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5411204607152241954" /></a>I am a forty-three year old alumna of <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#990000;">kinship care</span>. <div><br /></div><div>When I was young, I always felt like an outcast as my grandparents stood among the parents of my peers. The fact that I lived with my grandparents always seemed like the big white elephant in the room between my friends and I; their subversive questions attempting to uncover the cause. Foster care was an <span class="Apple-style-span" style="color:#990000;">unspoken phenomenon</span> in my world; something of Dicken’s tales and cartoon worlds.<br /><br />As a foster care professional of 16 years and a doctoral student, presently writing a dissertation on foster care issues, I have read a large amount of literature on foster care. None provide the information in such a grounded and realistic format by <a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org/">alumni for alumni</a> as FLUX.<div><br /></div><div><a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org/resources/FLUX.htm">FLUX</a> provides the first guidebook to foster care; a manual of sorts…something I only wish I had when I was younger. The individual accounts of the various foster care experiences written by different alumni really spoke to me personally. Each provided me, the opportunity to reach into the recesses of my mind, pull out the little girl that felt as if she were an outcast so long ago, and show her that she was <a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org">not alone after all</a>. </div><div><br /></div><div>I thank the authors for providing such an immensely helpful resource and ultimate source of healing.</div></div>Sharonhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13736149874712432463noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3030218870759201256.post-43243151284428513242009-12-03T10:06:00.000-08:002009-12-03T18:16:18.008-08:00Emotional Transition From Foster Care to Adulthood<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNY15Ssvy1dJs9SfLrFBaQ30SkRLDWpeENua8wo9szDyF7iYaKig47In6lHDBj_Od76knfINbsoZBz6idH7myccNf77T7E2VFEfNDMod3-hJovVJhMOtTdGiDcR14T6sytApratlvlOQM/s1600-h/never+grow+up.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5411109976814477442" style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; width: 400px; height: 321px; text-align: center;" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgNY15Ssvy1dJs9SfLrFBaQ30SkRLDWpeENua8wo9szDyF7iYaKig47In6lHDBj_Od76knfINbsoZBz6idH7myccNf77T7E2VFEfNDMod3-hJovVJhMOtTdGiDcR14T6sytApratlvlOQM/s400/never+grow+up.jpg" border="0" /></a><br /><div><span style="font-size:78%;">This postcard was made by someone in or from foster care as part of the <a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org/postcard_project.htm">FCAA Culture of Foster Care Postcard Project</a>.</span><br /><br /><strong>Flux</strong> (n.) <em>continuous change, passage or movement<br /></em><br />Ever wished someone should have been there to tell you what to do? Or given you a flashlight… so you can find you way through the dark? Wished someone truly understood your pain, and silent victories?<br /><br />YOU ARE NO LONGER ALONE… <a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org/resources/FLUX.htm">FLUX</a> was written for YOU.<br /><br />Flux is the <a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org/resources/FLUX.htm">honest, useful, juicy "how to" guide</a> on what it really means to become an adult after growing up in the system.<br /><br />Real life advice, and stories written by over 100 adult alumni of foster care who have walked in your shoes, and lived the same journey …<br /><br /><strong></strong></div><div><strong><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">Let's be real</span> -- and talk about:</strong></div><ul><li><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">How to be a parent when your parents were the system</span></li><li><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">How to build true intimacy when you’ve experienced broken trust</span></li><li><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">Where to look for a support network now that you’re on your own</span></li><li><span style="color: rgb(153, 0, 0);">How to be the <i>you</i> that you want to be!</span> </li></ul><p>So grab a box of tissues and popcorn and laugh and cry your way through the whole book! We shared our hearts, our lives, and clues we’ve picked up so far about how to find a good life. </p>bostonian foodiehttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11121359089119536340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3030218870759201256.post-23635046856220306032009-12-03T09:46:00.000-08:002009-12-07T11:01:42.984-08:00How to Be A Parent When Your Parent Was A System<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiw95iSQIc3YuraYO93rBkCP7STyv0V-OwSl-133PEFtr4LfGYeDwMsryzhBco1ivY1_x_g9iLHgZvA-_oM0fklCGG8-ylBElxsDjeq1fBs12ou_xzh8UZpBNHRtHiiV50a9j0AOTUAOTE/s1600-h/life+always+dreamed.jpg"><img id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5411115878674943218" style="DISPLAY: block; MARGIN: 0px auto 10px; WIDTH: 364px; CURSOR: hand; HEIGHT: 400px; TEXT-ALIGN: center" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiw95iSQIc3YuraYO93rBkCP7STyv0V-OwSl-133PEFtr4LfGYeDwMsryzhBco1ivY1_x_g9iLHgZvA-_oM0fklCGG8-ylBElxsDjeq1fBs12ou_xzh8UZpBNHRtHiiV50a9j0AOTUAOTE/s400/life+always+dreamed.jpg" border="0" /></a><span style="font-size:78%;">Postcard created by someone in or from foster care, as part of FCAA's <a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org/postcard_project.htm">Culture of Foster Care PostCard Project</a>.</span><br /><br /><div>I grew up in just about all aspects of the system. Starting with Kinship care, then facilities, group homes and foster homes. I think the happiest times were when I was with my grandparents.<br /><br />One of the things I knew at a young age is that I didn't want to turn out like my parents. My Father is a drug addict who spent most of my life in prison, and my mom -- well she tried hard but never really got a grasp on how to be a parent.<br /><br />Now I am pregnant with my first child. I want my baby to have a better life than I did and for months now I have been afraid that even though I want so much for him, I will find myself following in my parents footsteps. All parents want more for their children than what they had, but that want didn't do much for my siblings and me. I feared that somehow my genes will keep me from being a good parent.<br /><br />Then I read <a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org/resources/FLUX.htm">FLUX</a>. The chapter on how to be a good parent really helped calm my fears. It was a comfort to me knowing that I was not the only one who has been consumed with these thoughts. This paticular chapter of the book has helped me so much. Becoming a parent is a wonderful but really scary experence. I feel more comfortable with myself after reading the book and would recomend it to anyone who is having the same concerns and feelings I have. </div>Cletahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08686619700112261340noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3030218870759201256.post-8078320147622524502009-12-03T08:55:00.000-08:002009-12-03T09:15:34.334-08:00Welcome to Our Online Book Discussion<a onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}" href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgO5X0Sm82Wl4lr5XfjfH8egydmD6bP99cV_Ck5mE3H3vuaJxa_Rd6opPVIg8QTsV6Dse2EplT5w93lS7L1Gb7bEiVuUT8Kk2RJAb6MUifcNMamkYAyzD4itP4TcylB029qFYbEnj_qClY/s1600-h/FLUX+Book+Cover.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px auto 10px; display: block; text-align: center; cursor: pointer; width: 274px; height: 400px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgO5X0Sm82Wl4lr5XfjfH8egydmD6bP99cV_Ck5mE3H3vuaJxa_Rd6opPVIg8QTsV6Dse2EplT5w93lS7L1Gb7bEiVuUT8Kk2RJAb6MUifcNMamkYAyzD4itP4TcylB029qFYbEnj_qClY/s400/FLUX+Book+Cover.jpg" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5411058780007055570" border="0" /></a><br /><a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org/resources/FLUX.htm">FLUX: Life After Foster Care</a> was written to support young people during the emotional transition from foster care to adulthood.<br /><br />Who knows the emotional journey from foster care to adulthood better than <a href="http://www.fostercarealumni.org/">former foster care youth?</a><br /><br /><span style="font-weight: bold;">FLUX explores</span>:<br /><br /><ul><li>Personal experiences of over a 100 foster care alumni</li><li>Emotional transition from foster care to adulthood</li><li>Discovering and rediscovering our identities</li><li>Creating and recreating support systems</li><li>Navigating relationships with our biological family members</li><li>Risking and exploring intimacy</li><li>Discovering how to be a good parent</li></ul>Lisahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11944993180509479994noreply@blogger.com0